To the Girl in the Woods,
Nothing I can tell you will ease the pain of what you're enduring. Nothing will make this assault any less excruciating on a physical or psychological level. But I can tell you this… You survive. That may be of little comfort, if any at all, in a time when you're stripped of every ounce of dignity while being defiled in ways unspeakable. I know you wish for death, for the embrace of eternal darkness so that you may be relieved of your suffering. Let me assure you - survival goes beyond breathing through literal torture. It goes beyond getting up the next morning and masking the anguish consuming you. Survival, dear girl, is building a life in which we are whole, a life filled with safety, unconditional love, and purpose. No, your purpose is not to satisfy the sadistic desires of those corrupt cops. Your purpose is not to make your trafficker stacks of cash through abuse at the hands of other perverted men. Your purpose is not to serve your employers at the cost of your own needs and wants. Your purpose is to LIVE.
As they march you into the trees, each agonizing step taking you farther from the reality you once knew, look up at the stars. Those stars, sweet girl, cannot be taken from you. Those stars, more than a decade later, still hang high - beyond the reach of despicable monsters. Take comfort in knowing that that celestial blanket will always be there, for it is a beauty that cannot be snuffed out by the violent predators holding you captive. Harness the light of the sparkling sky above, by remembering that your heart is just as untouchable. They may break your body and borrow part of your soul, but they cannot break your loving spirit. Just as with all our other abusers, a piece of you will remain with them, but not because they own you. No, we own them. We own the memories and by fracturing our soul, we can keep the monsters locked behind a barricade until we are ready to release them. One by one we will slay them, becoming stronger through each and every battle. We get to choose when and how we approach this war, for we are unstoppable warriors.
I write this to you as an integrated survivor. I promise to come back for you, to release you from your position as an exile in the darkest depths of my subconscious. I will accept and liberate you. I will give you a voice, a safe place to be heard, a place in which you're believed, supported, and empowered. I will love you.
Dearest Girl in the Woods, it is not your fault. You have not chosen to be there. You are not responsible for the crimes committed against you. You are not less for being treated like the dirt you're writhing in. You are not disgusting for being used in ways unimaginable. You are worthy of love, respect, and compassion. You are deserving of joy and healing. You are more than you believe right now, so very much more. You are something to be really, really proud of. I am proud of you.
Love,
Future You
